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Friday, October 05, 2007

i'm FREEZE & TIRED! talk to ah boy until 4 plus nearly turn 4.30am soon.. wake up at 6.20am... FREAK! yesterday went to vivo with mood sark.. freaking ass si daniel... i dunno anything he scold me vulgar.. tat is why i so pissed! kinda angry for no reason.. i bang and knock my tumb on the side handle.. WAH FREAK.. IT MAKE ME CRY! damn freaking pain~ jon and fiona got ask me "ARE U JEALOUS?" well... i NOT jealous lah.. kinda of i reach vivo liao... nvr even talk to me.. ask him something he say nvm nth... I DUN UNDERSTAND! well.. u dun say of course i dun understand.. i tink i changed! i hate the way i being now.... wanna CRY OUT LOUD! why am i doin lik tat? why am i changed to different person? WHY? i just cant figure out... my hair drop alot.. kinda feel lik I'M SICK! lols.. this few days slp so late.. bo bian? i afraid lah.. well... next week check-up.. kinda abit HOPE THAT MY HEART GOT PROBLEM.. AND JUST LET ME DIE SOON.. cause i changed! so i was lik NOT THE PAST VIVIAN! maybe ppl read liao will think i crazy? will tink i trying to act? the fact I DUNNO! just wanna cry out loud for no reason... i tink i really crazy.. i also dunno wat am i tinking so are my frens too... anyway how can a guy change his feeling so fast? a few weeks ago get rejected by ME! now come a new wan... feeling so fast? kinda abit CHEATED MY FEELING althought i dun lik him at all.. asss... I FEEL SO DEPRESSED!

just now stopped a few mins.. chatting with fiona on msn den talk to colleague and tink other things.. *I'M SORRY FIONA & JUN BAO ABOUT YESTERDAY AT VIVO!* i shall not stick with fiona too much.. so both of guys can settle.. I'M SORRY.. kinda abit guilty.. i really depressed! wanna cry out... i tink i really crazy.. outside of my kinda look cheerful and crazy.. inside of my dunno wats wrong with me.. feeling so pathetic.. so confused... they wont understand de man.. i tink i gonna need some time to let go of this BAD DREAM! just msg junbao and said sry to him... wats wrong with u vivian. i hate the way i am now.. just let me die instant of staying alive.. throat spoil, lungs spoil.. COUGH FOR SO LONG.. nth come out.. IT FREAK ME.. HELP~ jon say all thing to me ytd was right.. i tink he wake me up abit? i dunno.. he more mature den me.. tat the fact... "future is right on ur hands, want to catch it anot, want to treasure it anot, is depends on yourself not others. think properly before you do ur suggestion." seriously i dunno wat am i thinking.. but still thanks jon make those stupid joke lah.. lols.. and teach me some cantonese.. 1 to 10.. LOLS.. finally i smile.. =) tat great... lols.. yea.. this is the way vivian always do.. smile always, make other ppl happy.. cheers...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MUMMY! and thanks AZMAN for the cakes he gave us yesterday at coffee bean.. thanks.. muackx... lols..

*edited* just now at msn tell samuel something.. he read my blog.. he say a crazy cheerful girl will post this.. make him feel scary.. lols.. iszzit? i tink so? yesterday dunno wats wrong with me lah.. suddenly got tink abt how smoking feel lik ar? wanna try lehx.. I NOE IS STUPID! heng tat i didn do anything stupid. i tink if smoke i shall go die lah.. lols.. my heart cant take it i tink? this few days really make me cough lik hell.. DAMN FREAKING ASSHOLE! lols.. i also dunno wats wrong with me today lohx.. damn bull shit! haix.. ah boy keep asking me wat happened.. wat i send to samuel thing. i didn tell him.. i tell him go see my blog and read it lohx.. lik tat HE CAN IMPROVE HIS ENGLISH LEHX.. see i helped him 1 more thing.. hehe.. dunno lehx.. yesterday got think of the smoking word in my mind.. but really heng lah.. just now also go ask ah boy.. SMOKING FUN AR? lols.. i'm the only child in this family nvr smoke loh.. come on.. shall not let family disappointed! they dunno how i really feel ba? see.. OUTSIDE LOOK HAPPY! INSIDE IS DIFFERENT.. but mostly me happy lah.. god already give me a great smile liao.. no more worries.. lols.. can say so quite xin fu liao? aiya.. dunno man.. shall end here liao.. hehe.. cya!

posted on 4th oct'07 11.02 pm!

`V I A N . A H G I R L ❤ J O N A T H A N . A H B O Y*

12:52 AM